Meal In A Pill.

At Fresh Brainz we take great pains to keep up with the latest trends in food science. One of our colleagues has travelled to the US and returned with this marvel in American F&B technological innovation.










A box of jelly beans!

You don't look impressed.
















With 40 Earth-shattering flavors!

OK fine. You might have eaten that many flavors of Roti Prata. So that's not all that special.

But wait till you see this, my friend. Ha ha.












You can pop different combinations of these jelly beans and mash them together to form new flavors! They don't melt immediately, so you can "park" a few in your mouth and think of what others to add before you munch 'em all.

OH BOY OH BOY OH BOY!

So if I were to pick five different flavored beans I could have a total of 40X39X38X37X36 = 78 960 960 possible combinations! 79 million combinations! How cool is that?

Of course randomly popping clashing flavors of stuff is a potential stomach-turner. Just like when you mixed all those soft drinks and sauces together and tricked your best friend to drink the "special blend". It can be a painful experience.

Now you know why he hasn't talked to you for the past 15 years. Oh well, he was stupid.

To avoid this, the jelly bean company has printed nice recipes on the sides of the box. And we know that they work because we actually tried them. Ah, the sacrifices we make in the name of science!

Recipes like Banana Cream Pie, Blueberry Muffin, Pink Lemonade, Cherry Cola, Fruit Salad, Lemon Meringue Pie and Tiramisu. OH BOY OH BOY OH BOY!

Truth be told I used to be a fervent opponent of tablet foods. Years ago I watched a Garfield cartoon. He travelled in a time machine into a future where the only food available was in pills. A whole meal in a pill. Jon put just one pill in Garfield's meal dish. You should have seen his miserable face as he swallows that one tasteless, utterly unsatisfying piece of nutrafood.

ARGGGHHH! What a bleak and desolated future! It's making me cry!

Not any more. I now realize that tablet food can be fun. Just a misunderstood and demonized food technology, that's all.

Well, excuse me while I go whip up a mixed fruit cream pie topped with chocolate, buttered popcorn, toasted marshmallows and jalapeno peppers. In my mouth.

You laugh. "Ha ha ha ha ha! You will get sick of that and come back to real food you nitwit!"

I'm a grad student. What's real food?